Postponing orgasm | The best tips

Do you recognise this? Are you in the heat of the moment and suddenly it's over. Oops! It is estimated that about 30 per cent of men between the ages of 18 and 60 experience premature ejaculation at some point in their lives. So you are not the only one! Before you consider yourself a sexual failure, it is worth understanding that premature ejaculation is quite normal. In this article, we dive deeper into the underlying causes. We also cover some proven methods that help make delaying orgasm easier.

What is premature ejaculation?

Premature ejaculation is a certain form of sexual dysfunction that occurs before a man starts intercourse or less than a minute after he has started. There are no rules about when a man should ejaculate but when he ejaculates so quickly that there is no time to enjoy it we speak of premature ejaculation. Ejaculating too quickly can be a frustrating experience for both the man and his partner. Once it happens more often, it can affect the sex life considerably.

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Causes of premature ejaculation

The direct cause of premature ejaculation is still unknown to this day. In the past, it was often thought that the cause of premature ejaculation was purely psychological. However, there are now a number of studies showing that beyond the psychological aspect, there is also a biological aspect at play. 

Some well-known psychological causes of premature ejaculation are:

• Poor body image
• Depression
• Stress
• Worrying about premature ejaculation
• Sexual abuse

Well-known biological conditions that can cause a man to cum too quickly are:

• A disturbed hormone balance
• An inflammation or defect of the bladder or urethra
• Disturbed balance of substances in the brain

Now that we have listed some of the causes of premature ejaculation, it is wise to check whether they apply to you. If it is caused by a biological problem be wise and consult your GP. The GP will suggest a treatment that will get rid of your problem in no time.

If your condition is psychological it will be more difficult to solve the problem, but don't worry. Fortunately, there are techniques you can apply without needing a sexologist or therapist.

Delaying orgasm by the start and stop method

This is a common and effective way to train your orgasm timing. In the start and stop method, your partner stimulates the penis until you are about to cum. Just before you are about to cum, the partner stops stimulating so that you are back in control of your orgasm. You should repeat this process about 3 times. The fourth time, you continue with your partner until you reach orgasm. Repeat this exercise 3 to 4 times a week and you will see that after a few weeks you are much better able to implement orgasm postponement.

Delaying orgasm by wearing a condom

By wearing a condom during sex, you can reduce the sensitivity of the penis just enough to maintain your erection longer without coming. There are some condoms that contain numbing agents that make the penis less sensitive. It is also possible to apply these drugs directly to the penis about 15 minutes before sex. Of course, discuss this with your doctor first.

Delaying orgasm by masturbating

Door regelmatig te masturberen leer je je lichaam beter kennen en ben je in staat je orgasmes te beheersen. Probeer een aantal keer te stoppen net voordat je je orgasme bereikt. Hiermee train je jezelf om je orgasme uit te stellen. Hoe vaker je dit oefent hoe beter je in staat bent je orgasmes te controleren. 

Be relaxed

Several studies have concluded that anxiety and stress affect your sexual performance, and can lead to accelerated ejaculation. If you want to delay your orgasm make sure you don't worry too much about what could go wrong. Breathing exercises and meditation can help.

Focus more on foreplay

The consequence of premature orgasm is that the man feels he has failed to satisfy the woman. By taking more time for foreplay, you bring the woman into higher ecstasy. When you start intercourse after this, the chances of a simultaneous orgasm are higher.

Delaying orgasm through distraction

When you are aroused and approaching your climax, take a deep breath and think about something else for a while. Be careful not to think about something else for too long, this will weaken the erection completely, which is obviously not the intention.

Delaying orgasm through pelvic floor exercises

By exercising your pelvic floor, you can strengthen the muscles that support the bladder that make orgasm possible. A good exercise is to tighten yourself while urinating and hold up your urine stream for 10 seconds. Then start urinating again. Try practising this several times every day and you will notice that you are more in control of your body.

Above all, remember that getting good at sex is a skill. Learning to delay orgasms can take time. But you will find that practice makes perfect. As soon as you notice it is not improving seek help from a professional sex therapist or consult your GP.